


Wonderful Life

by WinterReadingerDixon67



Series: Marvel OneShots [5]
Category: Marvel, Marvel (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Angst, Angst and Feels, Based on an Alter Bridge song, F/M, Implied Smut, Original Character Death(s), Sad, Song Based, its long but its good, sorry for the feels
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-05
Updated: 2016-10-05
Packaged: 2018-08-19 17:40:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,110
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8219512
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WinterReadingerDixon67/pseuds/WinterReadingerDixon67
Summary: Bucky shares the times he had with his wife before she passes.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Based on the song Wonderful Life by Alter Bridge. It’s quite a sad song, but the story will make sense after you listen to the song. Motionless (Part 3) will be posted later this week, schools a bit demanding at the moment.

_ Beep. Beep. Beep. Beep.  _

 

“Grace, it’s me again. Don’t worry Steve and Nat have the kids. The doctor said you should wake up soon. Everyone’s waiting to see you. Uh, the kids did great at their first recital. They understand why you couldn’t be there. God doll, I really need you to wake up. Please.”

No one ever told you the warning signs or how all the pain and anguish that would follow. No one ever told you the countless sleepless nights, the uneaten meals or the side effects of the treatments. This was like a disease no one ever wanted to talk to you about. You never expected it to happen to you until it did. 

Cancer. It left your body weak, tired, struggled to keep up with treatments. Every move you made was painful. Just yesterday, Grace found out that she had terminal illness, in this case, cancer. We were wondering why she was always getting sick and not able to keep any food down. And now we finally had our answer. The doctors said there was nothing we could do, besides to try treatments, but there were no promises if they would actually work. 

* * *

Grace and I met at Stark Tower. She was an assistant to Bruce and Tony, as soon as I saw her walk into Bruce’s lab, I knew she was the one. She wore her hair in a loose bun and had glasses pushed up her nose. I watched as she squinted her eyes and her tongue peek out of her mouth in concentration, as she worked on my arm. I messed it up pretty bad on a previous mission, causing the plates to stick together. Tony and Steve knew I had a small crush, well a pretty huge crush on Grace, so they never missed a chance to tease me about it.  _ “Why don’t you just tell her?”  _ Steve always said, but I couldn’t. Every time I walked up to her, all capability of speaking vanished. Making me leave in a babbling, stuttering mess. But after this mission, Tony made sure Grace was the one to work on my arm. They both told me to just tell her or they’d tell her themselves.

 

“Yes!” I looked down at Grace when she cheered under her breath. She looked at me with her beautiful eyes, they sparkled behind her glasses. I laughed to myself when she pushed them up her nose when they slipped down. “What doll?” She placed her tools off to the side and picked up some tweezers, “Oh, I-I’m just excited because I found the problem with your arm. Without doing any damage.” I rested my head on the back of the chair, laughing out loud now. “Oh doll, I’m pretty sure the only damage you’re doing is to yourself.” Her hand paused and she squinted  at me. “What’s that supposed to mean Sergeant Barnes?” I turn my head towards her, my eyes roam over her face, down to her perfect mouth and back to her eyes. I noticed a small blush fill her cheeks when she saw that I was staring at her. “I know you’ve been staring at my ass whenever I would leave the lab doll. Not to mention, how you become flustered over your bowl of fruit when I walk in the kitchen with just sweats on.” Grace’s face dropped to the floor as she covered up her face with her hands, her face turning redder now. “Someone kill me already.” I reach over with my right hand and lifted her chin up, “If you died, then I wouldn’t be able to do this.” Before she could say anything, I pulled her face towards mine and kissed her softly. Her lips were so soft and fit perfectly against mine. She smelled like freshly fallen rain and honey. I leaned back and became flustered, I just kissed her. “I’m sorry, that was stupid and way too forward. I…it’s just.” My hand ran through my hair nervously, I looked away from her and focused on the wall behind her. “It’s just what Bucky?” My head jerked back to her when she said my name, she’s always called me Sergeant Barnes and not Bucky. By now she was standing in front of me holding my hands in hers. “I-I like you Grace. Hell, I like you a lot. You’re basically the only one who makes me laugh. You’re the one who makes me want to get up in the morning thinking that I’m worth living. It’s hard to explain, but whenever I’m around you, I feel at peace. The world seems to stop when I look at you.”  

 

Grace giggled quietly and kissed me softly on the corner of my mouth before she leaned back. “I like you too Bucky.” I felt as if a weight was lifted off my shoulders. She liked me back and I knew that everything was going to be just fine. “Good, I was afraid you didn’t feel the same. This would be awkward if you didn’t.” She smiled as she finished my arm. When the last few adjustments were made, the metal plates put back into place, tools put away, she walked back up to me. She handed me a piece of paper, with her phone number and address written on it. “There’s this cute little diner down by the corner where I live. They serve the best burgers and milkshakes. Not to mention I’m good friends with the owner so, I get free pie.” I quirk my eyebrow at her, silently asking her to continue. I knew what she wanted to ask, but she was just so adorable when she was all nervous and flustered. “Would you like to come with me? As in like… a date?” Grace was wringing her hands together, stopping once in awhile to pick at her nails. I stood up from the chair and reached down to grab her hands in mine. I kissed the top of both of them, rubbing my thumbs across her knuckles as I smiled down at her. “I would love to Grace. How about I pick you up at 7, then maybe we could go see a movie afterward?” She nodded her head at me and smiled back. I leaned down and kissed her cheek before I left the lab. I walked through the halls with a big smile on my face, glad that I finally told Grace how I felt about her.

* * *

That was a two years ago today, we were currently sitting in our living room watching as our two-year-old son played on the floor with his toy cars. When Grace first told me she was pregnant, I panicked. I made the worst mistake of walking out of the house and driving away. It’s not like I didn’t want kids, I really wanted to start a family with Grace, but it was my arm and my past that haunted me. What if they hated me? Scared of me? Or worse, what if I hurt them? I don’t know how long I was gone, but it was dark when I got back. I walked back into our house, it was quiet, too quiet. Every worse situation running through my head as I rushed around the house to find her, frantically searching each room. I stopped searching when I heard quiet whimpering from the other side of our bedroom door. I gently opened the door to find her on the bed, her shoulders shaking. I walked over to her and knelt on the floor.

 

“Grace, doll please look at me.” She turned around, her back facing me. “Why should I? You left and never told me where you were going!” Her voice cracked when she spoke. “If you don’t want to start a family with me, that’s fine. But I’m not getting rid of the baby Buck! If you want me to leave, I will. I just can’t stand it Bucky, I thought you’d be happy.” I move to sit next to her, rubbing her shoulder softly. “ _ Our  _ baby, Grace.” She turned to lay on her back, she stared at me, her eyes red from crying. I hated that I was the one who caused her to cry. “What?” I let out a small sigh and reached up to wipe away her tears. “I do want a family with you, Grace. And I’m sorry I left like that, it’s just… I was…I didn’t know what to think. I mean a kid, a  _ kid _ Grace. You’re carrying my child inside you and I freaked.” She sat up and grabbed my left hand in hers as she reached up to caress my cheek with the other. “It’s because of your arm isn’t it?” I just looked at her, I didn’t need to say anything because she already knew the answer. “Oh Bucky, babe they’re going to  _ love _ you. You have nothing to be afraid of.” Grace sat on her knees, taking off my glove, weaving her fingers through mine. “Your arm, your arm shows strength and love. It’s what keeps me safe at night. I wake up with it wrapped around me; letting me know that I’m protected and that I have nothing to worry about. This hand wipes away my tears, holds my hand when we walk in the grocery store. This hand picks me up when I fall down after you trying to teach me how to swing dance.” I laugh along with her at the memory. She brings it up to her face and she kisses each knuckle before placing it on her abdomen, where our baby was now growing. “This hand is going to be holding our child, tucking them in at night, tickling them around the house, picking them up when they fall down.  _ I love you  _ Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes, arm and all.” She places soft kisses all over my face as I lay down on the bed next to her, rubbing my hand across her back, but it would always end back on her stomach. We talked about the nursery and baby names well into the early morning. 

* * *

“Mommy, daddy, look how fast I can go!” We watched as Anthony ran around the living room with a spaceship, making whooshing sounds. He was a bright kid for his age. He picked up a lot of things when he was growing up. We decided to name him Anthony Grant Barnes. Besides our differences, Tony and I slowly became good friends. I guess this was one way of me letting him know that I was thankful for everything that he’s done to help me. Anthony had my hair, my love for space and my eyes. But he had Grace’s smile, nose, her laugh, he even had her quirky behavior. He loved hanging out with Steve and Tony whenever they visited me at the tower. “You’re so fast bud! Faster than Steve.” He stumbled a few times, but he ran and jumped on my lap. He was laughing, showing off his toothy grin. “Do you think I will be fast like you daddy?” I pick him up with my left arm and get off the couch, Grace was currently by the front door holding his Hulk backpack. Steve was coming over soon to pick Anthony up to stay with him over the weekend, so Grace and I could spend some time together. I ruffled his hair and kissed his nose, “You’re going to be  _ faster _ than me sport.” He reached over to Grace and she took him, smiling brightly. His small arms wrapped around her neck and he placed tiny kisses all over her face. She laughed when he smooshed her face in his hands and he pecked her lips. She squeezed him tightly when the door opened. “Steebie!!” He jumped out of Grace’s arms and ran to Steve. He picked him up and threw him up in the air before catching him.

 

“How’s my favorite little Avenger?” Anthony shoved his toy at Steve’s face, “Mommy got me a new spaceship!” Steve looked at it, “Dude this is a pretty cool ship. You’re going to have to teach me how to fly it when we leave.” Anthony’s eyes grew big. “Really unca Stebie?” We tried to correct Anthony whenever he said Steve’s name wrong, but it brought a smile to Steve’s face, so we stopped. “Thanks Steve for taking him for the weekend.” Grace handed over the bags to him. “No problem, anything for this little guy. Okay, Anthony say goodbye to mom and dad.” He reached over to me and wrapped his small arms around my neck. I squeezed him tightly before placing a kiss on his forehead. He then reached out for Grace, she smiled at him and hugged him just as tight. He leaned back and grabbed her face and pecked her lips softly. She kissed his nose softly, before rubbing hers against his. “You be good to Uncle Steve okay? We’ll see you soon baby. I love you.” “I wuv you too mommy.” Anthony waved goodbye as Steve drove away. I wrapped my arms around Grace’s waist and leaned my chin on her shoulder. It was rare for us to get a weekend to ourselves. I would be on missions most of the time, while she would stay home with him. When Anthony was first born, she decided to continue her work for Tony and Bruce, but do it at home, figuring it would be easier for both of them. But now, I had a family to come home to. 

 

We walked back into the house and into the kitchen. Grace put the kettle on and grabbed our favorite mugs. “So Sergeant, what are the plans for this weekend?” I move her hair over her shoulder and placed small open mouth kisses up and down her neck and across her jaw. She tilted her head over to the side to give me better access. I found her sweet spot where her neck and shoulder meet and bite it gently. She moaned slightly as I slip my hands to her hips and pull her against me. “I want to make another one.” I pull up her shirt and toss it across the kitchen, she shut off the stove and turned towards me and grabbed my face, leaning up to kiss me. “Well…you’ll just have to wait 8 more months before we make another one.” It took me awhile to understand what she said, but then it clicked. “Wait…a-are you pregnant?” Grace smiled up at me and nodded “I wanted to wait a month before I told you.” She squealed when I swung her around. “I love you so much doll. You’ve given me a wonderful life.” She kissed me and looked at me seductively while tugging the hem of my red Henley. I quirked an eyebrow at her, but she just pulled it over my head, it joining hers on the floor. “We still got time, might as well not waste it.” I picked her up and walked over to the couch, “You’re going to be the death of me doll.” Our tea forgotten. 

* * *

But now, Grace was laying in a hospital bed, with IV’s and tubes coming out of her. Her skin pale, the sparkle in her eyes was long gone, she lost all of her hair. Not to mention all the weight she lost. We had a beautiful, healthy baby girl before Grace’s cancer arrived. Her name was easy to come up with, Natalia Rose Barnes. Natasha was Grace’s best friend and Rose was her grandmother's name. Natalia looked exactly like Grace, she had her hair, her eyes, her smile all the way to her nose. Anthony was now four years old, and Natalia just turned two a month ago. They were outside in the waiting room, waiting for me to come get them, to say their goodbye’s to mommy. After going to several chemotherapy sessions, seeing multiple doctors and surgeons, it was confirmed. She only had six months to live, if she was lucky. I sat next to her, rubbing her knuckles softly, listening to her raspy breathing. “Bucky?” I look at her, her eyes slowly opening. “Hey, babe.” I kiss her forehead softly, bringing her hand up to my chest. “I think it’s time to tell them.” She places her forehead onto mine and takes in a shaky breath. “Okay doll, you want everyone else in too?” Her head nodded weakly. I help her sit up and leave to bring in the others. I place Natalia on my right hip and hold Anthony’s hand with my left one. “Mommy!” They both run up to her and try to jump on the bed. “Hey sports, take it easy on mommy. She’s very fragile okay?” They both nod at me, I gave them each a small smile and pick them up so they could sit next to her. Everyone else walked in, Steve looked at me, I shake my head and turn back to my family. Grace was holding their hands in hers, looking at both of them.

 

“Now, I need to tell you something and it’s very important. Okay?” They nod at her. “I’m going to go into a deep sleep for a long time. I won’t be waking up, but you’ll see me again. But you take care of daddy okay? He loves you both very much.” She paused, to gather herself. Trying not to break down in front of them. “But don’t worry, you’ll have the rest of your family here for you too.” They both looked at the rest of the group. “Momma?” Grace ran her fingers through Natalia’s hair. “Yeah sweetie?” She gave Grace her stuffed rabbit, “Take Floppy with you, that way you can have a friend to keep you company.” Tears flowed down Grace’s face, “Thank you baby, I’ll keep him with me forever.” She looks at me and nods, I walk up to them. “Okay, let’s let mom rest okay?” Steve and Nat came up to bed. “I love you babies, so much. Be good for daddy.” Grace placed kisses on both of their heads, pulling them both into a hug. “We will mommy, we wuv you too. Sleep well.” Steve and Nat carried them out of the room, the others followed. The room fell quiet again, as I hugged Grace on the bed. 

A couple hours passed as Grace’s health started to deteriorate. The doctors said that she didn’t have much time left and that whatever I wanted and needed to say, I should do it now. We sat in still silence, still getting over the fact about what was happening. “Remember when you took me swing dancing for the first time? And I kept on tripping on my own two left feet.” I laughed at the memory, rubbing my hand along Grace’s back. “Yeah, then we had to practice our first dance for our wedding. Who knew you could be so clumsy.” She playfully slapped my chest, “Just because I’m not an assassin, doesn’t mean I still can’t kill you Barnes.” I lean back and stare deeply into her eyes, “Thank you doll.” 

“For what?” Still clueless as ever, I kissed her softly. “For giving me a wonderful life. For loving me for who I am, staying by my side whenever I had a bad day. You helped me believe in myself again. You’ve given me so much.” I kiss her cheeks, her nose, forehead, before placing a kiss on her lips. “You gave me a new life. You made my dreams come true.” 

“What were those dreams?” I lifted her hand and kissed the ring that I gave her. “I married you. Made a family with you. Man, I see you in them all the time. I can’t believe I actually have kids. I never thought I’d have a chance to even have a family until I met you.” She brushed off the tears that escaped my eyes. “I’m glad that I was able to make your dream come true.” She started coughing, her monitors beeping rapidly, her eyes rolling to the back of her head as her body shook. Nurses and her doctor rushed in and went to work. All I could do was stand in the background, watching as they frantically tried to get her breathing again. I haven’t told her yet. Grace you need to wake up, there’s still more I need to say. 

* * *

 

Grace didn’t have much time left. The doctors pulled me aside and informed me that they won’t be able to get her to wake up if that happens again. “Doctor?” We look up to Grace. “Yes, Mrs. Barnes?” She breathed in deeply before she continued. Becoming weaker every second. “I’m ready.” His mouth formed into a thin line, looking at both Grace and I before nodding. He talked quietly to the nurse and they gently took out the IV from her arm, and removed the breathing tubes. Grace wanted to go peacefully, without machines trying to keep her alive for the last few minutes. She wanted to go naturally. Once they were finished, they left once again. “I love you Grace.” 

“I know; I love you too Sergeant James Buchanan Barnes. Kiss me?” I lean down and kiss her gently. I pour out all my love through the kiss, hoping that it gives her some peace. How I wish I could take away the pain. “James…” I look at her with misty eyes. “Promise me you’ll move on. Don’t dwell on me too much. Our kids need you and you need them. Don’t shut them out. Please?” Fresh tears formed in her eyes, I kissed them away and rested my forehead against her chest. Her heartbeat growing faint. “I’m not ready to let you go, Grace. There’s still so much more I want to say. So much I want to do with you. We still need to go to Italy to see the canals. We need to bring the kids to Disneyland. You can’t go yet. Not yet.” Her hand weakly squeezed mine. “I’m ready to go James, but I’ll  _ always  _ here with you. I’ll be here in Anthony and Natalia. I love you so much baby. We had a wonderful life together. Let them know how much I love them Bucky. Don’t let them forget about me.” I lift my mouth up to hers and cup her face. “I’ll tell them every day doll.” I whispered against her soft lips. “James…tell me your vows again?” I nod my head softly.

“Grace, my best friend, my better half. I’m so glad that I messed up my arm that day, or I wouldn’t have the chance to finally fess up about how I felt about you…….”

* * *

 

An hour later, Grace let out her last breath. She was gone. It hurt knowing that she was not coming back to me. I kiss her cold hand, taking in the way how peaceful she looked. I held her in my arms, embracing her one last time. Placing one last kiss to her lips. “I love you, so much baby. Thank you for everything.” I run my knuckles across her cheek. Breathing her lavender and honey scent in one last time. It was so hard to let her go. She was my best friend, my better half, my love. She was the one thing I could never replace. “Sleep well Grace, we’ll see each other again.” I slip off her bed, taking one last glance at her peaceful figure before letting the others know. 

 

“Daddy, is mommy sleeping now?” Anthony and Natalia ran towards me when they saw me walk in. I kneel down to face them. They were holding each other's hands when Natalia reached for me. I pulled them both to me and kissed the tops of their heads. “Yes kiddo, mommy’s sleeping. She and Floppy are going to have good dreams.” I picked up Natalia and held onto Anthony’s hand, walking over to the others. Natalia’s head was in my neck, her arms wrapped around me. Anthony clung to my left hand, playing with the metal fingers. Steve walked up to me and gripped my shoulder, “You okay Buck?” I shift my eyes between the group, forcing the tears not to fall. “Honestly? No.” But then I look at my kids, seeing Grace in them. I saw her in the way their eyes sparkled when they got excited, in their giggles when they were making faces at each other. I saw Grace in them, reminding me that she was here with us. 

 

“But I will be.”

****


End file.
